IT

becauseidrift

I am hearing you.

Many people have stopped me in the street and asked “why did you quit writing?”  I haven’t…. well, I have for a bit.

The truth is…

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My heart is so heavy.  My mom has the forgetting disease. I know, IT has a name but she doesn’t want to be labeled so I am not going to say it either.  I have really been taking it hard because she thinks that I have been getting into her house when she is gone and stealing her things.

It’s really become

more prevalent since we were going to Cincinnati… her hometown.  Mom’s parents didn’t have much money or many monetary items to really speak of but, she did have this one amethyst ring.  The one her Uncle Bud found and gave to her mother.  The story goes that my grandparents took the ring to the jeweler to have it appraised and he switched out the stone.  So the ring, doesn’t have a real amethyst, it has a glass look a like.

Several years ago,

my mom took me into her bedroom and gave me several pieces of jewelry; a white gold brooch with pearls…they are real. We all scratched them on our teeth, a pair of earring jacks with pearls that Morgan and I both wore in our weddings, a sterling silver pocket purse with a sterling silver pocket knife.  Anyone who knows my mom knows that a purse is not complete without a pocketknife and that amethyst ring.

So…

when I went to Cincinnati for Tacoma’s wedding shower I spent Thursday night with my parents.  We were sitting in their living room watching TV and mom said, “You know, I am going to take that ring to Cinci to give to my cousins, if I can find them.”  I replied, “Oh, what ring?”  She told me the story again about the ring.   I said, “Oh, I have that ring… You gave it to me many years ago.”  All she said was….”YOU HAVE THE RING.”  Needless to say… It’s a deal….A really big deal.

For Colton’s wedding party

she came to the house and saw all my pictures hanging on the wall and kept complimenting me on how my wall looked like hers, and how much she liked it.  But, when she got home it turned into, I took them out of her scrapbook.  If something is missing, it’s because I took it on Monday when she and daddy work at St. Vincent De Paul.  The other day when we were at Seadrift looking over all the damage done by hurricane Harvey she said she was missing a toilet brush.  She turned to me and said…”I wonder who could have taken that?”  img_2830.jpg

A coupe days ago,

she sent me a note telling me to bring everything back or she was going to call the police on me…. Today, she did just that…..

So now what?

What do I do?  I have been pondering over this issue for some time.  I have cried many tears trying to figure this out. I have so many questions.   How can I help her?  How can I help my dad?   Why does she think I am the thief when I live so far away?   I always come up with the same answer… I can LOVE her anyways….

If you know me at all,

I try to find the silver lining in everything.  I think……I think….. the silver lining in all of this is that she still knows who I am.

Cecilia the Thief….

Here is a picture of my parents with Jadon my grandson at Colton’s wedding in Cincinnati… Her hometown.

grand and greats

 

 

 

 

19 thoughts on “IT”

  1. This breaks my heart! I can’t imagine how deeply this cuts you. I admire you so much for continuing to find the silver lining. The love IS still there…it is being hidden by the disease. You are in my prayers.

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  3. It takes a lot of courage and love ❤️ to survive this time in your parents life. You are are a beautiful wonderful daughter who deals with this with grace

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  5. I’m so sorry Cecilia. My heart aches for what you and your mom are going through. Alzheimer’s is the thief. It steals the memories and trust from the patient and it deprives the family of her love and sweetness. I have no doubt she loves you immeasurably, but she is struggling and her memory is fading. Love you both and I pray that she will seek help.

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  7. OH MY DEAR FRIEND, I haven’t opened my email or facebook since I left for Cincinnati….
    I got up this AM and the first thing that popped up on FB was your post. I read the beginning and some of the comments, and thought I don’t have time to cry…so fast forward to eating alone in a restaurant, I decided I had time to read and my curiosity got the better of me. I thought,” What did CC do this time”. So, I,with big tears roll down my face as I read, had to chuckle at the toilet brush, and I think God Love you, you little thief. The wedding was GREAT and I do believe your Mom had a blast…. ( she got to be the center of a lot of attention with the plane delays, lost luggage, and being the Dancing Queen) Hang in their honey…. we all love walking with you through your life good and bad…. you are Wise beyond your years! And any of your friends will gladly listen and have some Wine anytime!!!

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  8. Cecilia ~ keep your chin up. This is a very ugly disease. Like someone said earlier. Try to remember it is the disease ~ my mom suffered with it as well. She was not as aggressive in her thoughts or actions. So I cannot imagine what you feel when your accused. Under all the layers, she is the loving mom you once knew try to hang onto that. It will not get easier but just love her the best you can. I pray for all of you especially your dad. No one knows what the caregivers go through until you do it yourself. Keep on keeping on the best you know how. God has a plan. Hugs friend! ❤️

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  9. You know I love you even before you were you! We have our ups and downs and I am here for you at the drop of a pin. This is and will continue to be a very tough journey for you and your dad, but you know you are always in my thoughts and prayers. If you need to escape pick up the phone day or night and call me. You are one of my favorite DAUGHTERS…..Love and kisses by way of the dove.

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